Sorry

I am sorry for the long absence. Of course, for regular people some four-five days is not much, but for me it is like a century. Actually I was planning to not write till the moment I get back to 75 kg. But this has totally not worked like I wanted to. Actually it corrupted me into eating more and hence gaining. So I won't allow such an epic fail idea again. And I will be more careful with the "in control" feeling. Yeah... I tend to get careless with that and saying that just a little snack won't hurt. It never works out and turns into something unbelievable. No one would believe me, if I would actually admit how much exactly I can eat. So yeah.

So I decided that motivation with rewards would be much more appropriate in my case, since there are things that I really want.
So, my first goal is to get to 70 kg and keep it below that level for a week. Then I will get my bellybutton pearced. It is something that I have wanted to do for quite some time already, but yeah. Fat girl with a pierced bellybutton doesn't classify as pretty in my book. So that is my first deal with myself. I have some ideas for next ones too, but I'll be thinking about thse later on ;)

It has been a tense time for me, so diet and blogging weren't exactly on my mind much. However, from tomorrow it is going to be all right again. I won't have to be scared to get on the scale. And I am going to go to a gym again. And fast again. And know that I can do things for myself. And I will make a daily scedule for things to do so I stop postponing all the stuff to the moment when it is actually too late already.

I really want to go to that gym though. The exercise machines are practically screaming for me to get to them. It has been too long.

So off to the bed with me now, so I can get up bright and early and get away from my home and all of that discusting food which tempts me into eating for stress-relief.

One more point, I cut my thigh again. Not poud of it, but it was such a familiar relief. Now to get those cuts healed before someone notices.