Wednesday, 30 March 2011


So I forgot to update yesterday. I wasn't busy, wasn't too tired, just... forgot.

Anyhow. Let's start with the fact that it was super fun to ride again. I hadn't been on a horse for I don't even remember how many years :D Definitely want to do that again sometime.

But on the negative side, yesterday was fucking cold! The wind was blowing so hard and it was even snowing periodically. And there we were on the horses for an hour in this shit weather. Also were outside for an hour before that and two hours after that, because obviously, the fucking bus comes once every two hours there and we missed one. As a result, I still feel a bit shaky inside. Yesterday after returning home say under a blanket with hot tea all evening and shivered.

And this leads to the fact that I sort of binged yesterday. Still had less then 1000, but it was suposed to be 300kcal day :/ At first had my peace of chicken and the bullion to keep me warm, but then started feeling my throat go numb and freaked out that I can fall ill. Hence ate honey and a couple of apricots. Should have stoped there, but then I don't even know why, ate three slices of smoked ham. Because it smelled so good, that I couldn't resist.
And felt like shit all the time.

Today woke up with a sore throat and full nose. So the honey didn't change anything. Shit :/
But went to the gym and ran till I saw that I have burned 1000kcal. At least that should undo the damage. But again the downside - I tripped over my own feet and I seem to have sprained my hip joint. So probably won't go to gym tomorrow. And my stomack is sort of upset that I ate that much yesterday.
Today is 400kcal day in ABC, but I am planning to have only slightly over 200. Serves me right for yesterday.

Anyhow. Off to do some cleaning. Burn some more of those calories.
See you later :)

Andy made me smile like an idiot with a single message. I can't be more happy <3

Monday, 28 March 2011


I really should be writing my essay not blogging but this is probably the last thing that I can figure out to procrastinate. I have done everything else already xD Even watered flowers all over my apartment, did some knitting while watching Simpsons, ate my cauliflower, thought about eating everything that my gran made today, which frustrates me. Actually still thinking, but I don't really want to, which is crazy.

But the day has not been bad.

The Day 6 (200kcal) of ABC is almost done. I am hoping to go to bed in 2 hours and hence avoid food by all costs. I hate it when gran is here. She cooks absolutely obsessively. I came upstairs at 12pm and she already had cooked a whole bunch of stuff. Then she proceeded to making salads, and meat, and potatos, and baked mushrooms, and etc, etc, etc. I think she is crazy! I have begged her so many times not to do it. But she does it never the less. I have cried, tried reasoning, shouted, threatened and cursed. Nothing works. And it is so difficult to sit here when the whole apartment smells of food 24/7. It is like a temptation galore every day. But I am fighting. I don't want to give up again. There I go again. Talking about food all the damn time. I am just so angry at the moment that I don't even want to see her :/

But I went to the gym in the morning. Spent almost 1.5 hours on the treadmill. Ran 10km and burned 750kcal. That was nice. I am still feeling a bit tired. But not all that tired, so I think I will be a-ok tomorrow to go again.

Ah. I wanted to comment on the song for today :D It is a Latvian folk metal band and they are ones of my favorites alltogether, so yeah. I am a bit of a nationalist. Have to admit that. And I am proud of my roots. I just wish that the government weren't such cunts. Anyway. If you like this one, you might like also other songs from them. Look around for Skyforger on youtube and such ;)

All right. I have run out of things to say xD No reason at all to put off writing anymore. So will make some tea and get to it.

I hope that this day was nice for you all too :)
Stay lovely <3

Sunday, 27 March 2011


I am so tired and there is absolutely no reason for that. Have been sitting on my ass all day and watching TV. And daylight savings suck! Seriously, it is 8:20 pm already. Feels like it shouldn't be that late.

Yes... And I guess some more elaboration about that last post should be due. umm... I don't even know where to start.
Well, probably it would be the best to start off with the fact that I had a lot of fun in the concert. It was real awesome. We had a photoshoot with my band playing-ex (that's too long to write out every time. Let's call him Bill) and some more friends, had a lot of beer and Jagermeister. The other Ex actually told me that his girlfriend is crazy jealous of me, which made me lol really hard.

But yes, getting to the point of yesterday's post. I have a really hard time with accepting and/or giving love openly. In the 8th grade I had my first BIG crush, which resulted in a disaster and me having a nervous break down and going absolutely mental. My classmates found my diary and after that my crush and the rest of my class made my life a living hell. Basically they drew me to the first time of trying to commit a suicide.
And after that point I don't trust people. Anyone at all. And also I promised to myself never ever to say "I love you" to anyone unless I would be 200% sure of the feelings in return. Basically I said that I will not give a shit about love ever again and hopefully won't have to deal with this tedious feeling.
So at this moment for me to really want to go and scream at the world that I love Andy is terrifying to me. I just don't want to be heartbroken again. I am too tired to pick up the peaces all the time. And I know that even now, if he would break it off, I'd be devastated. And what if I get these stronger feelings? That would probably drive me to the point of madness. And I am afraid to let someone have that much control over MY life.
So maybe that explains a bit more about what is going in this twisted little world that I call my mind.

But on to more cheerful and way shorter side of my post.

Day 5 (100 kcal) of ABC is done. Actually didn't even feel like eating at all. But had some lettuce with a spoonful of plain yoghurt and 2 small carrots. I really hope to see a decline tomorrow. I just don't want to be fat anymore. Enough is enough.

Oh. My parents just arrived, so I am signing off. Have to go and greet them.
So bye, bye. And till later.


Andy. I miss you like crazy. And the fact that I am drunk totally doesn't help me out at all. I wish I could tell you all of the things that go through my mind all the time. And the funny thing is, that you are there in at least half of the thoughts.
And I actually wish that I was not this drunk, but I am witing your this letter that will never be read by you.

Actually... Just wanted to say - I love you.

That's it...

Saturday, 26 March 2011

Bad List

I think my cat hates me today. I am staying alone at home, since the rest of my family left for the country house. I am so happy, like you couldn't believe it. But anyway, I decided to try bringing my cat downstairs to my basement, but he obviously hates the place or something. It has been 5 hours since I brought him here, and he stopped crying by the door just after two hours and for the last three hours has been sitting under the table and not coming out. I don't even know why. It is so frustrating, because he is supposed to be MY cat, but I see him the least. Which sucks. Will have to bring him back upstairs, because I think that he will have a heart attack, if I leave him alone when I go to the party.

And WhiteSkinnyAngel, your comment made me laugh so hard :D I have very liberal attitude towards sex, yes. And being nimphomaniac doesn't exactly help it. So I have lost my count quite a long time ago. Those guys were my ex-friends-with-benefits so to say.
However, now that I am together with Andy, it just feels really wrong to even think about others in a more intimate way. And he knows this about me and hasn't judged me for that. I can't ask for more ;)

Oh yes, Day 4 of ABC (400 kcal) - finitto :) Had my boiled fish with avocado and lemon two hours ago. It is 8pm and I am getting ready to go out. No more food for me. Also planned out my diet till the end of March. Now I just have to stick to it and it will be awesome. Also bought the foods that I will be needing for the next three days. That is - almost all. Will have to go and get my cottage cheese tomorrow around dinner time. Forgot to get it today :D Actually, it feels really strange to plan out the meals so much in detail. Really unusual and will take some time to get used to. But I keep telling myself it is worth everything.

So anyhow. I am going to get my hair and make-up done now. High time to do that, since I am going out in less then 2 hours or so :D

Stay strong and keep rocking!

Friday, 25 March 2011

You give Love a Bad Name

So as you can figure there is a pattern to the songs appearing in my blog. Generally, I post the song that I am listening at the moment of writing, so you get more of the mood that I got here while writing xD I am just a dork like that.

Anyhow, I am sipping the last cup of tea ("Yoga tea" from a local producer "Apsara". Which is really yummy and spicy). The day 3 of ABC, which is a 300kcal day, is successfully finished. I have the tomorrow's food already planned out. Actually will have fish and salad, since it is going to be 400kcal day and I can incorporate it. Also planning to go out in the evening and dance my butt off. It is going to be a goth night at one of the local clubs, so I am excited to go. My Ex is going to DJ and my other Ex is going to play with his band. We are still awesome friends with both, so it is all good. And being around those two always makes a hell of a good evening :D

Also I have almost finished kntting myself a bag. Which is awesome. I am guessing that I still have some 3-5 biggest loser shows worth of knitting to do though. Maybe finish it till Monday, but I am not really rushing. Still planning to do a solid amount of work on my essay. Hopefully somewhere between 5-10 pages worth of it. That would be nice to see.

Anyhow, I am really tired now and don't even know why, since I haven't exactly been doing anything much. Just sleepy and such. So off to bed with me.
Good night and stay lovely!

Thursday, 24 March 2011

The Beast Must Die

Yes, the name of the post is absolutely unrelated. But the song rocks, so that's why I am using it anyway ;)

Today was the second day of ABC so it was a 500kcal day the same as yesterday. However, I didn't feel like eating all day. For lunch had a boiled broccoli and for dinner one orange. Didn't even feel like eating that orange, but thought that it will be better to stay on the safe side and have it anyway.

Last night was quite fun. Not awesome, just average. Nothing really interesting, so I am just happy that I burned some calories on that dance floor. I really felt like I wanted to get drunk again, but having no money prevented that. It has been a while since I was drunk and I am missing it a bit. What can I say, I like my alcohol.
But at least I was good. I have always been picking up guys at parties, because I like sex a lot. But I didn't this time. And I must say that it felt wrong to even consider that. I have never previously felt wrong about it, so that was new. I guess Andy has an impact on me in this area as well. Will have to take some time adjusting to that, but it was not a bad feeling. When I came home at 6am all I wanted to do was skype him and tell that I am home. Though I miss him really bad despite the fact that we are on skype practically 24/7 :) But it is less then 2 weeks left till he comes so I am fine with that.

Tomorrow morning will go to gym. I don't care how, but I have to persuade myself to do that. I actually feel bad about not going there.
And next week me and my cousin are going horseback riding. We got an hour long ride as a present from my parents. I am super excited. Can't wait.

And by the way, I forget to mention all the time, I am taking part in a lose weight for charity project here in Latvia. The amount of weight we lose till the end of April is going to be donated to help three really sick kids. Gnerally I just want to lose as much weight as possible. And if I can go well into 60s by then I'll be super glad. And I know that I can pull it off. It shouldn't be so difficult, because I know myself. I just need to avoid binges. And since I am on ABC it should be all good.

Anyway. It is late and I am really tired. Off to sleep with me :)
Good night, my lovelies!

Wednesday, 23 March 2011


So I decided to start ABC diet. I think that it might be my last opportunity to drastically drop weight till Andy returns. Especially because I have been horrible in the last week or so, because I fell into some sort of emotional slump again.

I think that the last year of the uni is having its toll. I know I have to do so much, but I don't want to, so it is pressing on me with a weight of thousand suns. I need to write my bachelor's essay. And I know that I should be half done with it already, but my procrastination has lead to the fact that I have just some fifth done. And I get so stressed out about it that I am in a horrible mood and with no energy and I want to crawl away from people and barricade myself in my apartment with movies and comfort food. Which will just corrupt my situation even more in the long run.

Fuck... I wish I could just magically travel in time to end of June, when I will be over and done with that shit. eh... I am allowed to dream.

Anyway. It is time for me to get back to work and stop whining about things.
Sending you all skinnies.

Tuesday, 22 March 2011

The Curse of Millhaven


Glitch and Moonlight Mistress! I am so honored that you thought me valuable of the award especially considering all of the failures that I go through. Really thank you, girls!

So then here I go with the 7 facts:

1) I used to draw all the time. All of my notebooks were covered with doodles and I carried around a whole map of drawings around. However, for the last two years I can barely ever get any inspiration to pick up a pencil.
2) I honestly think that the amount of negative thinking about Japan and how much I don't want to have anything to do with it lately, has had some impact on the fact that the whole country is getting eliminated now. The bad part is, that I can't force myself to feel guilty. Which makes me a bad person obviously.
3) I think a lot of twisted things. Gore flicks and horror movies make me squeak with glee.
4) Sometimes I think that I will end up in prison eventually.
5) Music is my air. If there would be no music, I would off myself for sure. Actually it has kept me from killing myself so many times in the past.
6) I have considered hitman and stripper as legit carrier opportunities for me.
7) I want to know everything in the world. That is why I read all sorts of unrelated books.

As for the 10 bloggers that I would want to bestow this upon:
1) Toni
2) Kat
3) MadelinaCooke
4) Olivia Lee
5) Journey back to SKINNY ME!
6) WhiteSkinnyAngel
7) matrunner
8) Charl.
9) Thin_Envy
10) billiejean_1

I love reading your blogs, girls. And I am really sorry that I don't comment all that much. The stuff is going really hectic here and it is hard to wrap my head around everything.

On the other hand, I had a feeling that I really want to draw today. so this is what came out of the silly sketching session:


Nothing really fancy or anything, but just something. That is how I see my cigarette smoke. I have been smoking a lot lately. Which is probably not good, but whatever.

Oh and this song is going to make me smile a lot from now on. Andy sid that it has always reminded him of me. Which is sweet. And I love that song.

Anyway. Have a nice day everybody :3

Sunday, 20 March 2011

Binge and whatnot

I want to start with a huge thank you for the support on the previous post. Girls, you are awesome! Though that makes me feel really shit that I couldn't go at the diet for all weak.

The day after the fast I felt so sick after the gym that decidet to have some food, but of course being that horrible person I am, I ate so much. Obviously those three days of diet did absolutely nothing in the long run. I am feeling huge and lethargic, like all I want to do is sleep till I wold feel empty again. Hate this stuffed feeling. Even bought natural laxies - sennae pills. But of course, since they are natural and stuff, the effect is so mild, that it is practically non-existant. So absolutely no use just a waste of money.

Tony, you asked about fasting with diet coke on my last post. I do believe that it is not a healthy thing to do quite honestly. Considering the fact that Coke can help you get rust off from metal and stuff. But I have never been big on health, so I tend to overlook that. It is more like that feeling - it is sweet and tasty and I can still have it. It helps me fight my cravings for certain time. I hope that I could explain xD

I keep staying up really late. Which is Andy's fault. We are both horrible procrastinators and keep putting off our study/job things. And to do that we skype a lot. And look on internet for all sorts of fun things and share them... And it becomes like a neverending circle of doing nothing productive. I mean tonight 3am I was still not sleeping and browsing 4chan for lack of better things to do even though I had decided be a good girl and work on my bachelor's essay. And to top it off I was snacking on crisps. Now it is 9:30am I woke up just now and I am feeling sleep deprived and my stomack hurts from eating too much and too late.

On a more positive note, we are learning a lot about each other and just how corripted we both actually are. I don't believe that there is even the slightest chance for heaven after I die. And the thing is, I'm totally ok with that.

Relatedly, have some Jim Jefferies speaking on religion and pandas to improve your mood ;D I am warning you, if you are really religios, you are going to get insulted, don't watch. But he actually nails my oppinion really well xD

Anyway. Have a great day, lovelies. I'll try not to procrastinate and talk myself out of dong nothing all day again.
Have fun :)

Wednesday, 16 March 2011


Yes, yes. I know that I have been spamming lately. But I feel like writing all the time. Probably could sit and write all day and then post some huge thing which would take forever to read :D

Feeling way better then after the gym. Actually the woozyness passed not such a long time after I posted. Some three hours maybe.

I went out in the evening. Bought myself a ticket for an opera translation. I'm excited to see it. It is "Anne Boleyn" with Anna Netrebko and Elina Garanca (who is a Latvian. I am so proud of her). Can't wait.
Also ought myself a pair of jeans, because my old ones are so worn out that there is a hole on the thigh. I'll probably make shorts out of them. But the new ones are nice. I still need to work on my weight so they fit better. I hate always having to look for the big sizes. It is fucking annoying. I need my ass to decrease.

But at least the fast went ok. I haven't eaten anything. Just drinking my diet coke, which has decreased my apetite. Thank god for that. Otherwise I tought that I won't be able to hold through. Even took a chocolate candy and chewed it. Then spit it out before I managed to swallow any of it. No way I am going to succumb to the temptation this time.

Oh and Andy let me know that he is coming again in April. I seriously need to work on my bachelor's till then. I want to have as much free time as possible when he is here. And I want to rid myself of uni related things. They are bothering me too much.

I am almost ready to drop dead and sleep till the morning. So tired today. i hope to get some energy in the morning.

Good night and stay lovely :)

Animal I have Become


Feeling pretty damn bad. Maybe I overworked my body or something, but at the point it feels like waves of nausea are coming and going. I just hope I don't get a really huge wave. Even though I don't think that I got anything to throw up. Just water. My last meal was almost 20 hours ago and consisted of half a cup of corn. No way there is anything left. And I am feeling hungry. Like really hungry. I-could-eat-EVERYTHING hungry. But that is ok. I knew that it will be like that. It isn't a surprise, which is probably why I am able to hold through it.

I'll try taking it easy for the rest of the day. I know that I'll still have an hour long walk in the evening, but I suppose that I'll be better till then.

Oh my lord I am tired. I would much rather just sleep the day away, but I still got my music lesson and solfege, and a lot of work on my bachelors. Why do I have to feel like crap when I got so much to do? D:< Fuuuck.

Only that song is still pushing me through. Actually it is pretty much how I am feeling. So it is probably going to sit on repeat all day xD

Oh yes, and I wish that Andy was here. I am missing him so badly now. Though if he were here, I'd probably get no work done what so ever. Cuddle up to him, joke around, watch some movies and fall asleep. Honestly, that is all that I want to do xD Well, sucks for me. Work now, play later.

Stay strong, girls. We all need that ;)

Love you to Death...


To begin with, Glitch, the specifics of the rainbow diet are some posts ago in my blog :) It is basically eating certain amounts of specific color food each day. It is really restrictive, but that is what I like about it :D

So today is my fasting day. And my muscles are really sore. Like my feet are killing me. But I am off to gym in a couple of minutes.
Yesterday was going really well in every way. Intake and exercise and I was doing physical things like crazy. Oh and had a 15 minute sauna session in the gym, which was nice for my sore body. Though today I am feeling like not doing anything at all, which is bad. Bad girl, bad. A lot of things to do!

Anyway. have to stick to my schedule, so I am gone like five minutes ago xD
Stay lovely, girls!

Tuesday, 15 March 2011

RIP Anthony DiGeronimo

I might have never met you or even known you, but what happened to you was unjust. We have the right four our own oppinion without people telling us what is the correct belief. I believe that we'd have had a lot to talk about. You will not be forgotten.

Hence today is something heavyer in my playlist:

On the more positive note, Rainbow diet is going well. Yesterday was nice and I don't really feel hungry jet. Tomorrow is a fasting day though, so I probably will start feeling it then.
I am off to gym again.
Stay strong, beautiful girls!

Monday, 14 March 2011

The Loneliness Of The Long Distance Runner

Felt like listening to that again :D And wanted to share it with you too.
Probably felt like listening to this, becaus I just ran 8 km. My feet are like jello and I am loving it. An hour on the treadmill, 25 minutes on the eliptical, 15 minutes on the bike, 100 squats with 30 kg weight. Then a long shower and came home.

I revised my daily schedule to make it more apropriate for human. Like incorporating some periods of time to do something for myself. Like watching a movie, knitting, reading, whatever the hell I would feel like doing. This time it actually looks acceptable.

I'm off to do stuff. Have to study that Japanese.

A Place Called Home


Finishing my morning tea (Special Chai blend that Andy brought me). Tasty, tasty. I love teas so much that I own some 20 different sorts. It is like a biggest decision of the morning which one to drink :D

I'm about to go to the gym and run until my feet fall off. Actually I'm spending an hour on the treadmill, which gets me to around 8km, which is good. Just thinking that I'll have to do almost 3 times as much makes me creep out a little. But I am really excited. 2 more months to prepare myself for that.

Oh I keep getting these creepy food dreams. Like when I wake up in panic that I have been binging like a maniac. And then even go to check to fridge just to make sure that I was not really sleep-eating. Scares the crap out of me. I don t really think it is normal at all.
Oh and I was walking around the city bare foot in my dream. That was a nice feeling. I wish summer comes sooner.

Bye, bye beautiful girls. Sending you skinnies!

Sunday, 13 March 2011

Rainbow diet

Hello my darlings!

Have any of you heard about or even tried the pro ana rainbow diet? I stumbled on it by accident today and decided that it would be the best thing to try it myself. Especially since tomorrow begins a new week and I am really willing to get myslef going right. So the food plan for the week goes like this:

Monday (white):
Breakfast: ½ apple (40.5 cals)
Lunch: ½ apple (40.5 cals)
Dinner: 1 cucumber (24 cals)
Total: 105 cals

Tuesday (yellow):
Breakfast: 1 banana (108.5 cals)
Lunch: 1 banana (108.5 cals)
Dinner: ½ cup corn (66 cals)
Total: 283 cals

Wednesday (fast):

Thursday (orange):
Breakfast: ½ orange (31 cals)
Lunch: ½ orange (31 cals)
Dinner: 1 carrot (26 cals)
Total: 88 cals

Friday (red):
Breakfast: ½ cup strawberries (21.5 cals)
Lunch: ½ cup strawberries (21.5 cals)
Dinner: ½ red pepper (16 cals)
Total: 59 cals

Saturday (purple/blue):
Breakfast: 10 blueberries (8 cals)
Lunch: 10 blueberries (8 cals)
Dinner: 10 raspberries (24 cals)
Total: 40 cals

Sunday (green):
Breakfast: ½ cup grapes (57 cals)
Lunch: ½ cup grapes (57 cals)
Dinner: 1 cup lettuce (7 cals)
Total: 121 cals

Week total: 696 cals

I think it would be so awesome for me to do it. At least detox my body. And afterwards I could go on SG diet. I am sure that I can totally do the working days. The only point I am worried about is the weekend because I am around my parents practically all day and on sundays they like us to have lunch together. I guess I'll just try lying my way out of it again. Not like I am not able to do that. I am a compulsive lier anyway, so not much difference.

Unrelatedly, It has been a really long time since my last post. Basically because I have not been good at all. That horrible fat pathetic person has awoken again. I had my period finally. I already was thinking that I might be preggers or something. And that was totally not necessary. Also caught a cold. Damn, I hate being sick.

By the way I quit the band. Which makes me sort of relieved. It was not working out anyway.

On the positive note, the things with Andy are going well. It only frustrating not to have him by me all the time. That would make things way better.

Anyway. I'll be updating more from now on and let you know how the Rainbow diet is going.
Have fun everyone!

Tuesday, 8 March 2011

No words...

I don't know how I feel again. Somehow, I have gotten to some sort of a deep emotional hole today. I guess that I can't get too much happyness in my life. Soon enough I start second-guessing myself and I corrupt myself to fall in to an abyss.
Needless to say that I have binged like crazy. The disturbing thing is that I don't feel guilty, or sad. I don't reall feel anything at all. Which is way worse.

Anyhow. I want to be good. Maybe that would make me feel something. It should, shouldn't it?

On other hand, I look at the small bruise/hickey on my hand that reminds me of the beautiful weekend that I had with Him. And I am compelled to smile, remembering the hickeys I left on His neck.
Maybe my mind is throwing me into this abyss as a self preserving action. I know myself well enough. Nothing works out with people - girs, guys, romantic, friendly, whatever. I just screw up somehow and lose everyone dear to me. That is how it goes. And after the last fuck up, I had decided never to love again. But now I feel like that eternal freeze is coming undone, and I am terrified. And the worst thing is, that He has returned to England again and here I am just being able to read His lovely messages. And the more I read them, the more freaked out I get that I might screw up the best chance at happyness I have ever had. He knows me. 100% and He hasn't run off jet. But what if He comes back after a month and this time I say or do something that will freak Him out?
I know I am acting paranoid, but I don't know any better. That is what defines me.
I wish I could be more beautiful. I wish I were smarter, more interesting, more mysterious, more of everything. I want to be all the He would want to have. I would want to wake up to see His face in the morning and I want to feel His hands around me proving that I am not going to wake up to find myself back where I was before.

And this insecurity has thrown me into feeling that there is no control what so ever in my life. None at all.

Why can't I just rip my heart right out of my chest and throw it out? It hurts too much to have it...

Saturday, 5 March 2011

Fantastic day

It is a great beginning for a gorgeous day :) I don't remember when have I been this positive about a day alltogether xD

It is a sunny morning, 0 degrees C and it has been snowing at night so the streets are covered with snow.
Just stepped out of a shower and now sitting with a towel around my head still :D
Woke up at 6:30 to charge my iPod and a bit after 7am went for a nice hour long run that was 6km. It was a bit difficult to run along the river because of the sharp wind. My nose froze off xD
I found a training plan for half marathon (the 21 km one) online, and it actually seems possible that I could do it. Even though my feet are still sort of sore from the previous run. Suck it up muscles, we are doing this!
Did also 150 crunches and some stretching and splits. I feel so energized.

Now I'm going to have my kiwi and soy milk smoothie. It is simply yum! And gives me proteins after sports too, so a win-win situation.

fter an hour I'll surprse our sweet neighbours with singing. I think they will want to murder me for singing at 10am on Saturday, but the point is, I won't have any other time to do it, so whatever :P

And on 12 I have my date with Him. We are going to a tea house where we can lounge on big, soft pillows and sip tea for hours on end. Oh god, I love that tea house. And I can have a beautiful view on the Riga channel and park and opera house. How good can it get?

Oh yeah. The sushi party yesterday was Great. So tasty and good. Oh my god. Sinfully good :D
Though I am planning a 4 day fast beginning monday. Or maybe beginning tuesday. I am not sure jet. I want to know how long He is going to stay and then I'll switch my plans around a bit.

Anyway. Off to make my smoothie.
Have a fantastic day everyone! Love you all!

Have some of my kind of Thinspo ;D

Thursday, 3 March 2011

I forgot .

I forgot to update on other things aside the running xD Lame.

Yesterday me and my mom went out shopping and she bought me a gorgeous red dress. Which is a tiny bit too small for me, which is a win. I really want it to fit perfectly. And then I want it to fall off me. I really want it so bad!
Especially since I am going to wear it anyway on saturday when I am going out with Him. I am so excited! I miss Him so much.

And I had my Aura photographed. They said that I have a orange/yellow aura, which signifies determined people, thinkers with insightful mind, stubborn people and so on and so forth. I have like 20 pages of information xD
They also said that the best sports for people like me are running, swimming and cycling. I want spring and summer so bad now to do all that more often. I love swimming so much.

I think that I am hooked on watching The Biggest Loser. In some sort of perverse way I like watching fat people being tochered in the gym.

Another thing - I think that my period is trying to be a real bitch. My last one was on 4th of February, so it is really due. But since I am going out on Saturday, it probably will start either then or tomorrow. Just because. And I won't be able to get me sex. Which sucks. I mean seriously! I just hope it won't start for another week or so. Whatever that it is overdue. I just don't want to have it now.

Tomorrow evening I am going to the sushy bar with two of my cousins. It will be sort of nice I hope. And then we want to watch a movie. Probably The King's Speech, because one of them is really excited about seeing it. I just hope that it will be good.

Anyway. I still want to watch some of the Biggest Loser and continue knitting my bag. I think I'll be done with that soon enough too.

That is it for now. I'll be back tomorrow with some more updates :)

Decisions, decisions

I read just recently that there will be the Riga Marathon in 22nd of May. And my great decision is to take part in the 5 kilometer mini-marathon this year.

I have NEVER been able to run very well and NEVER have even attempted running long distances really. But I have been doing physical exercises a lot and have acheaved decent goals in endurance training.

So today I thought, what the hell. I'm going to go out despite the stupid snow and ice covering the sidewalks and despite that it is coldish outside and just try out how far can I get. And I just finished my running that lasted 1 and a half hours. My final result is 8.9 km :D Yay! And I feel totally fine. I could still run longer just I am worried that I might catch a cold or something. That actually shows that I might go for a better faster time result.

It will take a lot of exercising, but I can totally pull it off. And to think that when I was graduating high school, I couldn't run 1.6 km in the stadium. Makes me sort of proud of myself.

I actually wish I could go for the half-marathon, which is 21 km, but I thin that would be a bit too high for me at the moment xD Maybe next year. And after that the full marathon of 42 km. That one sound totally unreal to me at the point. But a lot of people do it.

Anyway. That is just a little something I have decided to do :)

Oh and other thing. I am trying to figure out a way to quit my band. The work with them is going absolutely nowhere. Which is a pity. I thought that it could be promising, but it has gone straight into a dead-end :/ Oh well. You win some, you lose some. I have some way more important things to win anyway.

Sending you skinnies!