Sadness

Andy had to leave tonight to go to Latvia for his granny's funeral. She died on Saturday morning. I am really sorry that I can't be with him. It is such a hard time when someone passes away. And I really think that I should be there. Through thick and thin. But I couldn't get more holidays. That is out of the question. I already had to take three days off last week as I was having a really bad fever and lost my voice completely. So I am going to be paid less this month already. I just couldn't do anything about it. But I feel so bad about it. I know that it is not correct that I am sitting here at work.

I will come back to an empty home this week. He will return only on Sunday, so my Valentines day will be spent by myself again. I wish it wasn't like that. But there is nothing that I can do about it. So might as well stop moaning. I'll go home, light a candle for the granny and spend a week by myself.

Today was a good day weight wise. I broke a new barrier. I was 69.5 kg this morning. I haven't seen a 6 in the beginning of my weight for eight years. I was really glad about that. And maybe I will be able to drop down to 67.5 by the end of this month, which will mean that I will have dropped 10 kg since I started vegan diet on the 2nd of January. I really hope that I can do that. I don't know if it is possible, as that would mean losing 2 more kg by the end of the month, but the hope dies last. I really hope that I will not suddenly break down food-wise again. I have had a relatively low breakdown amount this year, so I am again hoping that it will stay like that.

So now it is time for me to go home, do some singing exercises, warm up the vegan pie and have a quiet evening.

Take care and see you soon.